Morning Sickness or Something I Ate?

Sunday morning I woke up with a bit of a scare. I wasn't feeling too hot and well just plain sick. As I placed Baby E down after her wake up feeding it hit me; I ran to the bathroom and....threw up. WTF? As I rinsed out the nastiness from my mouth I began to think, where was my period? I should be getting it if not already gotten it already. My heart almost stopped. Don't get me wrong, I want to have another baby but not right now. DH and I would like to wait till March so I can go back on Maternity Leave for baby #2. In Canada you have to be back to work for at least 4 months to get benefits from the government for a full year. Plus, the thought of being Preggo again while still trying to figure this parenting thing out...oh dear god! I always look at mothers with 2 under 2 years with such admiration, they are truly superheros...and ones with 3 under 3 years...well, you're just plain crazy! :P

I walked back into our bedroom with Baby E in hand and I could see it on DH's face. I passed it off like it must have been something I ate but I wasn't 100% sure. Thankfully I did get my period later on that day so must have been something I ate. No baby #2 just yet. Hopefully, when March rolls around Baby#2 will too.

Thank goodness this all happened on a Sunday. DH was at home and took care of Baby E all day while I slept. All I had to do was nurse her and back to bed I went. Last night I asked him how he liked it. He says to me "I was exhausted by the end of the day!" good to know he now knows how I feel everyday :)

Saving and Splurging with Baby

Public Service Announcement: Having a baby is expensive. That is all.

I actually think having a baby is like planning a wedding. Once you say it's for a baby, the price jumps. Just like when you say it's for a wedding. Why? because they know you'll spend the money. I mean this is for your unborn child right? why wouldn't you?

I can't imagine how parents who earn a lower income do it. Obviously you'd cut on some things but how about major things you need? Diapers $30/box on sale, Baby monitors $50.00 (low end), Crib $100.00 (low end), Car seat and stroller $300+ the list and price points go on and on. All these things accumulate and the next thing you know you've spent thousands of dollars all before your baby has been born. I was at home organizing Baby's room and I took stock of all the stuff we've gotten and accumulated. Given, I was very spoiled my my friends who were very generous at my baby showers and I got a lot of hand me downs from my sister and her two boys; however, there are lots of things DH and I got on our own; and all this before Baby is even born. So I figured I'd list a few important things to-be moms should consider (in my opinion) spending the denaro on and some things you can cheap out on and maybe the financial hit would hurt so much. Now, remember this is just my opinion; I may just be a paranoid first time mom; I have no science to back this up :)

Splurge:

Breast pump

Reason: You only have one set of boobs and you should do what you can to keep them happy. Breast feeding can be difficult for some, so why add to it with a cheapo pump that doesn't make things easier.

Update your Will

Reason: What happens if you and your partner die. Not a cool thing to think about but something to think about non the less. Who is gonna take care of your baby?

Blood Cord Banking

Reason: There may be family medical issues you may not know about and the advancement of technology is happening so fast that if I can help my child if he/she ever needed medical help for illnesses like certain cancers, I think the yearly banking fee is a small price to pay.

Lotions and creams

Reason: I think there are so many chemicals out there now a days that natural or organic is best. Last thing I want to know is that the cream I used for baby had side effect that was realized years down the road.

Car seat

Reason: Keep your baby safe. Need I say more? A good car seat can protect your baby, isn't that reason enough?

Steals

Clothing

Reason: Baby doesn't care what he/she is wearing. This is purely for the entertainment of the parents. I say have 1-2 nice outfits when Baby has a public appearance and the rest of the time who cares, hand me downs and used clothing from thrift stores do the job. Plus, people love giving clothing as presents so you may not even have a shortage by the time Baby arrives.

Change Table and other furniture.

Reason: After the baby has grown out of the crib (if not convertible) what will you do with it?

And isn't a change table just a dresser with a pad on the top? so Why not use a dresser with a change pad on the top? DH bought me baby furniture as a Christmas gift; he finished the whole nursery as a surprise for me, He bought a change table as-is from a furniture store, a glider off a used website, book shelf from Ikea and we had a hand me down crib from my sister. It all matches and honestly I think we saved a ton of money.

Strollers

Reason: why do you need a $700.00 stroller? why? Honestly, I think function over fashion here. I know some people what the cool sleek looking strollers (DH being one of them) but really? $700.00 for something you baby will grow out of in a few years? Look, I'm not saying get the cheapest one you can find. DH and I spent a whole day looking for a stroller that was right for us, all I'm saying is fashion is not everything. We opted for one that folds and unfolds with one hand, is light enough for me to load up into the car, has no obstructions for Baby and has lots of storage. It may not be the coolest looking, nor is it the most expensive. It's a middle range stroller that will hopefully meet all our needs

There are so many other things for to-be parents to buy but really, if I went through it all this entry would go on forever, and nobody wants to hear my opinions that badly. My main point is this, Baby doesn't care if it's dressed in the latest baby fashions, if it has a pimp stroller or if he/she has a awesome bedroom. He/she cares about having parents that love it and will give them the attention they need and help them grow. All the other stiff is just to make the parents seem cooler in the eyes of everyone else; Keeping up with the Jone's baby style you might say. So if you need to save money, go used or skip the stuff you don't need ans spend on the things you deem as important. Generations have gone without super sophisticated toys or fancy all-terrain strollers and we humans have still turned out alright. I say just figure out whats important to you and go from there. After all, it's your money, spend it as you see fit. I'm just too cheap to pay $40 for a summer dress or a t-shirt for myself , let alone a baby.

The Home Stretch

So here I am starting my 35th week. Man, has this ever flown by fast. The other day we installed our rear-facing car seat and reality has really set in that in 3 weeks my body will squeeze out another human being. Seems like only yesterday I peed on a stick and watched 2 little lines appear. I will say this, even though I may complain about some of the discomforts of pregnancy (morning sickness, streatch marks, dumb ass people), I've had it relatively good and all in all have really enjoyed it. To be honest I may even miss being pregnant once Baby is here; I'm sure especially when I'm getting up for nightly feedings and changing dirty diapers. But since I'm up in the middle of the night now a days anyways, I'm guessing it may not be such a big adjustment.

Right now I'm feeling more anxious then I am fear. OK, fear is still there but anxious has added itself to the mix; Maybe it's because three women I know who were due in June have already had their babies, one as much as 6 weeks early. It's really hit home that this could potentially happen at any time. Hopefully Baby will wanna stay put for another 3 weeks or so.

Anyhow, as days pass by it's starting to really sink in. DH and I are having a baby! OMG! my life is about to change forever. I know I know, you're thinking "of course you are how are you just realizing this now?" but to be honest the reality of it all is starting to hit me. I'm off work now and I've been tying up loose ends before Baby's arrival and as my to do list gets shorter I realize I get closer and closer to my delivery date. I know I'll flop back and forth and sometimes thinking I have all the time in the world till one day in the not so near future I'll be on my way to the hospital. Does it make sense that I'm looking forward to that day but also dreading it at the same time?

Keep It To Yourself

OK, so here it is....I'm just gonna come right out and ask. Why do strangers feel the need to come and touch my belly? or unload their stories of child bearing on you? or better yet, tell you what you're having ? OK, not all total stangers, but people I am by no means close to. People like co-workers and clients, ok, and the ramdom slaes girl at the mall. When people see that you are preggo does that give people the green light to invade your personal space and impose thier "knowledge" of pregnancy on you?

Now, I really don't mind when my friends ask to touch my belly when the baby moves, I'm happy that they are happy for me and want to share in my joy or tells me about their expiriances of child birth, since they have had childerne within the last 3-5 years or so. Plus, they are my friends, I actually like them and respect their thoughts and opinions. It's poeple who were last pregnent 30 some-odd years ago or never at all who annoy me. Medical practices have come a long way thank you, and when they give me a shocked look when they find out I've cut out caffeine from my diet or opt not to wear a moo-moo when I'm at home accompanied with the comment "when I was pregnant this is what we did" That irritates me most of all; considering the fact that last time she gave birth was almost 30 years ago.

Take for example the other day, I was at the office going about my business when a co-worker came up to me and started baby talking to my belly. I looked at her like she had 2 heads, "Um...what are you doing?" I had asked. "You know he can hear you when you talk to it" she said; I thought to myself....I know the baby can hear me when I talk to it, but why is my baby hearing you talk to it? and how wonderful of you to automatically assign it a gender without me telling you. You see, I like to separate my work life with my private life as much as possible, so I didn't tell anyone I work with what the gender is or what the name will be. These people don't even make it on my Christmas card list so why would I share this information with them. But back to my point. Completely out of nowhere she gets into my personal space and starts to baby talk to my belly saying what a cute little baby boy my baby is and all that. I'm not talking from a distance. I mean face to belly people!

I have also had clients come into my office and give me thier "thoughts" on my pregnancy. Comments like "I think it's a boy because your belly is low" hmmm....ever think it's because I'm 35 weeks pregnent and ready to give birth in less then a month? Of course not. My favorite reason for why I'm having a boy is because I haven't gained a lot of weight....WTF?! The fact that I've been eating healthier has nothing to do with it I guess. I didn't know there were so many medical experts walking amongst us. The best is when I was shopping with DH and the sales girl asked me when I was due. At the time I said I was 6months along. She gave me this look like "What? really" and then proceeded to ask "are you having twins?" WTF? who says that to someone? What I really wanted to say was "no, I'm just fat and pregnant, whats your excuse?" but I didn't... I just smiled and said no.

Now, I understand this is just people being happy for me, and women (older women) tend share all their opinions with everyone. But really touching me without my consent, judging me for my choices in food and dress, assigning my baby a gender and invading my personal space just rubs me the wrong way at times. Am I being too sensitive and hormonal here or are these people deserving of my signature "WTF" face?

Hi, my name is...

What is in a name?...a lot!

I personally think naming your child is one of the biggest decision facing a soon to be parent. I mean it's for life right?
We was lucky enough to know what we wanted to name our baby. We had these names picked out long before we even conceived, early enough that DH included them in his speech at our wedding, sure there was a bit of going back and forth to make sure it was what we wanted but ultimately we had them picked out early. But it seems we are the lucky few as many parents these days struggle to choose a name for their little bambino. I don't blame them it's no easy decision, there are a lot of factors to consider.

I remember early on in our relationship DH and I had discussed baby names should we ever have children together. His initial picks for girls were totally ridiculous in my mind. Let's just say his picks are commonly found with girls swinging from a pole in a seedy, dark strip club..yeah, no go! So we made a deal; I would come up with names for girls if I would accepted his pick for a boy; which was fine, I could live with his pick for a boy.

Now I've always been a strong believer that people take on certain characteristic dependent on their names. Is it coincidental that almost every Christine I know has similar personality traits? Or that every Joanne I ever known has had smiler temperaments? I think that certain names carry with them certain traits. Say you have hopes for your daughter to be super girlie, sensitive, maybe even docile, you may want a name that represents all that. I wont give my suggestions in case it may start a firestorm of people who have those names who disagree. Which brings me to another point. Keeping your baby name to yourself. Two reasons, so nobody "steals" your baby name and so people can't put their two cents in, after all, despite what I say; it is your decision. But you need to keep this stuff to yourself, all you need is to come up with a name you love and have some a-hole co worker share his or her story of how he or she hates that name because they had a bad experience with a person of the same name. Some people just feel the need to share.

So what if you have negative name association? then what? One jackass could ruin a perfectly good name for you to pick from. Say you absolutely love the name Nicholas, you always wanted to name your son that ever since you were a kid, but then you meet a guy with the same name who was a complete moron and an all around butt head. That person has now ruined that name for you. Every time you call out for your son, you may be reminded of the douche that you knew way back when. Same goes for names of celebrities or quasi-celebrities. Maybe you've always loved the name Clay, but now you associate it with Clay Aiken and you can't stand him....isn't that name now ruined for you? Now given, it could work the opposite way, like if you idealize Marilyn Monroe to the point where you many name your daughter Marilyn, then then in that case, that name association works out well and I hope that you never have a bad experience with someone else of the same name.

Now after looking through some baby names, just for fun, I've also noticed people trying to give their kids names that are spelled in "new" and "alternative" ways. I understand you want your kid to stand out , but if that's the case then pick a different name. If you want to name your kid Jackson or Jennifer, then spell it Jackson and Jennifer, why spell it Jaxson or Jenipher? All you've done is set up your child for a lifetime of correcting people on the spelling of their name, especially if it's a common name. If you want a original name then pick an original name. Pull a Gweneth and name the kid Apple or a Gwen and name the kid Zuma. If you want original then commit to original.

So that's where I stand on names. It's not as easy as one may think, I mean this is the name your child will be known ans associated with for the rest of their lives, unless of course they change it because they hated it so much, but at the same time, why try to complicate things by changing the spelling? If you dream of being avaunt guard and different then pick a name that reflects that. just remember kids can be cruel and adults, well we know they can be cruel, opinionated and just all around judgy. So many factors to consider when naming your offspring. That's why I'm trying to keep ours to ourselves and honestly if anyone gives me any slack for the names well, they can come talk to me directly and I'll give them a piece of my mind....naturally.

Fear Factor

I hit my 32 week mark yesterday, and I will say this….”HOLY SHIT!” I cannot believe I have 8 weeks to go before my due date. These past 7 months have flown by and I have really loved being pregnant. Aside from the blood sugar tests and the aches and pains I’ve relished this experience and really hope I can do it again in the future. Mind you I have yet to actually give birth with will may have me crying foul and make me swear I’d never do it again. But for now, I am loving it. Until the reality sets in and the true magnitude of what will happen in the coming weeks hits me. DH and I are having a baby! OMG! A little person will be coming out of my body and our whole lives are about to change. We’ll be swimming in uncharted waters with a million questions and no doubt a few minor breakdowns on my part.

I am at a point where I have flash thoughts of fear. So many questions run through my mind:

I have to push something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a plum?

I’ve never been a pansy when it cames to pain, I’ve usually pushed through and dealt with it. But the thought of pushing a human being out of my body freaks me out just a bit (by a bit I mean a lot) Especially if it’s a big baby. The thought of an Episiotomy makes me shutter in fear.

Who do I trust my baby to?

This just may be my over protective nature, but it makes me wonder who I can trust my baby to. Now I know that for the first 6 weeks or so I’ll be there to feed the baby to ensure breast feeding develops well, but what about after?


Will I loose who I am?
I know my life will never be the same again, but what about the person I was before I had a baby. Will she still be here or will she be replaced by “one of those” women. Hopefully, it will be a good mix of the two.

Am I being too protective?

I’m a strong believer that being too protective really messes up a child. They learn to be afraid of things and don’t learn to develop a voice to have their opinions heard. Something I am known for…LOL. So where do you draw the line? When coddling becomes counter productive?


What if I do something wrong?

Now this is a loaded gun. So many things a new mother can do wrong. I know its going to be a learning process but I can’t help wondering, what if….
What if I bath the baby wrong and it results in something bad happening?
What if I don’t put enough layers on the baby and it gets sick?
What if I don’t produce enough milk for the baby will it grow properly?
What if
What if
What if…

and the biggest fear of all....
What if I'm no good at this parenting thing?

Beware: Hormonal Pregnant Woman...Proceed with Caution

I will say this, throughout this pregnancy I've had it pretty good (Knock on wood that doesn't change). I haven't experienced a lot of swelling, I don't have a lot of body pain, aside from my hips; which by the way makes me feel like I'm 80 years old, and I haven't had very many crazy cravings leading me to eat like crazy. In fact veggies and fruit is what I crave most. But one thing I have noticed is that I'm more easily agitated then normal; if you can believe that to even be possible. Now, many of you who know me personally know this, I am no bed of roses at times and I have a tendency to be brash, outspoken and just plain tough to take at times (we all have to embrace our faults people, and I've embraced mine). However, I have noticed that lately, my tolerance for some things stands next to nil. Maybe it's a maternal protective instinct, or just hormones but there is no doubt that I seem to be ready to throw down at a moments notice or give my signature look of discontent when something irritates me.

For example when people don't allow you to cross when it is clearly a pedestrian crossing in a parking lot. If you did this to me before I had become a human incubator I would have let it slide or at worse given you a nasty look. Now, I have no issues with flipping you the "have a nice day finger" or calling you out as the jackass you seem to be. In my mind, if you can't wait the extra 5 seconds for this preggo woman to waddle across the crosswalk, you're a jackass. Now, I can see how in situations like these it may be nothing more then a protective maternal instinct being protective of the growing human being inside of me, I mean you did just almost plow me over with your car, but I've noticed my tolerance for stupidity has also plunged to an all time low. Usually I had some sort of tolerance fro this behavior, but now a days it's next to zero. People making stupid comments, inaccurate information trying to pass as fact and just general douche bag behavior now causes me to roll my eyes and I have to bite my tongue (or I'll get fired or some sort of altercation would ensue). I guess I have to just chalk this up to being hormonal,after all I am supposed to me more moody now a days right? But then again I could also chalk it up to being exposed to an increased number of stupid people and jackass'...I think I choose possibility #2, it seems more of a realistic possibility. ;)

Whining rant #1

This is more me whining then anything else...be warned.

In the beginning I thought that if I literally doused myself in coca butter and Bio oil I could escape the dreaded battle scar of pregnancy, stretch marks. Sadly, this is one war I am slowly losing. Now, I will say this, I don't think it's as bad as some other women, but then again I am only going to to week 30. For those of you who don't know common areas for preggo stretch marks are on your hips, ass , breasts, thighs and of course the belly. I have them on the my lower belly. It looks like Freddy Kruger made his way to my belly and had a party. It sucks! They say that if your mom had stretch marks you will likely have them too...so I guess I was doomed from the start.

I'm hoping that with continued massage and many more bottles of Bio oil they will fad away.

Fingers crossed.

That it all.

Oh Sugar!

At around my 24th week, I, like almost all preggo women had to do my glucose test, aka, the nasty sugary orange drink test. This tested if I would have gestational diabetes. GD is more common in certain ethnic groups and I happen to be one of them.

Wikipedia defines Gestational Diabetes (GD) as:

Gestational diabetes (or gestational diabetes mellitus, GDM) is a condition in which women without previously diagnosed diabetes exhibit high blood glucose levels during pregnancy (especially during third trimester of pregnancy).

Gestational diabetes generally has few symptoms and it is most commonly diagnosed by screening during pregnancy. Diagnostic tests detect inappropriately high levels of glucose in blood samples. Gestational diabetes affects 3-10% of pregnancies, depending on the population studied.^[2]

Babies born to mothers with gestational diabetes are typically at increased risk of problems such as being large for gestational age (which may lead to delivery complications), low blood sugar, and jaundice. Gestational diabetes is a treatable condition and women who have adequate control of glucose levels can effectively decrease these risks.

At first, I also defined it as being a pain in the ass, but after the a few hours I realized this could be a blessing in disguise. My placenta was blocking my insulin production, so if left unmonitored my high blood sugar could result in me giving birth to a giant baby; something I did not look forward to pushing out. So my test came back positive, I knew this would go away after I gave birth and after the placenta was out of me but while preggo I was going to have to monitor what I ate, Sour dough dipped in balsamic and garlic olive oil and crazy no amounts of fresh white pasta for me, cupcakes were now put on the "maybe just half" list and trips to Bulk Barn for sugary snacks have now been shelved. As mentioned in previous posts, my body was no longer my own. I had a baby to take care of and that was priority number 1. So to limit and control sugar and complex carbs may be annoying but in the end if I have a healthy baby it's all worth it so I don't mind shelving chocolate for the next 3 months. I am really luck however, this baby has been craving all the good stuff, fruits, veggies and hardly any red meat. However, I did now have to control my fruit intake. I had to go from eating 5 servings of fruit alone to only 2. Bye bye apple and pear combo in the morning, Baby likes apples.

As much of a pain in the ass it is to test my blood sugar I see this as sort of a blessing. I've always loved food and loved carbs. Bread, white, crusty bread was always a favorite; but I know how bad it is for you too. Plus, all I have to do is control what I eat, at least I don't have to use medication or worse, inject my self in the ass with insulin. One of my fears was to gain a crazy amount of weight with this pregnancy. With the possibility of Gestational Diabetes a controlled diet has helped me control that. As of my last OB appointment (4 weeks ago) I had gained a total of 16 Lbs; today's visit I lost 7 off that. So entering my third trimester I'm going in healthier, not heavier (by much), but of course we'll see what the next 10 weeks will bring. In a few weeks I'll find out how big this baby is (and maybe the sex) and monitor it's growth. Cross your fingers its not a turkey! For my VaJJ's sake I'll cross my fingers and toes!

Boy or Girl?

Early on DH and I agreed, boy or girl we would turn our office into a baby room. Why? well it was a straight bee line from our bedroom and it was really the only room we ever really got around to painting since moving in 4 years ago, yes, we are lazy people. The room was blue with a blue and light blue checkered accent wall. We figured that boy or girl it would be OK. I mean It's not like the baby would mind what colour it's room would be, and wasn't blue known to be a calming colour anyway?

Now, this didn't mean we didn't we didn't want to find out the sex of the baby beforehand. I've never been a fan of surprises and I always felt like it there was a means for me to find out information, well, I was meant to find out the information. The control freak in me usually needs to know all I can about any given situation I'm in. You can imagine how excited both DH and I were when our 20 week ultrasound came up. This is when we get to find out if we were having a boy or a girl! We already had names picked out so we wanted to know. As the tech did her thing she finally got to the point where she asked us if we wanted to know the sex. Of course we did!

wait for it....

wait for it...

we're having a....

...baby!

Looks like our baby is just as stubborn as it's mommy. It just wouldn't move it's legs to show the goods. After 20 minutes of trying to change it's position, no luck; and that was that. It would move it's arms and wave but wouldn't move it's legs. We would just have to wait till our next ultrasound and that was months away. Ugh!

I will admit I was a bit bummed, DH, not so much. He said to me "if you are bummed it means you want it to be one over the other, I don;t care either way". I didn't "care" either, it wasn't like i could change the gender if I wanted to, I just wanted to know if my gut feeling was right, and I wanted to to be able to tell my parents what to expect since they only had grandsons so far. But, the baby had spoken so to speak and no dice. DH was right, ultimately to know that the baby is healthy and developing well is the important thing. Boy or girl it was really no matter, it would just be nice to know.

I will say this though, not knowing has come with its changes and blessings. Challenges because its hard to find nice stuff that is gender neutral. Green and yellow have been difficult colors to shop for and not a lot of the stuff is too cute in my opinion (I know it doesn't really matter, but I'm just saying). I've been opting for browns but it's much harder to find, maybe it reminds expectant parents too much of the mountains of poopey diapers that will be coming their way :) . Blessing, because I have refrained from over shopping on baby outfits and accessories; headbands and tutus for girls and Polo sweaters for boys. Boy or girl the baby will have to settle for what we have. A blue baby room and lots of baby boy hand me downs. That, until we have our last ultrasound that is.

You Are What You Eat

I'm sure I'm not the only first time mother to feel this way, and I'm confident that I wont be the last. Despite all the happiness and wonder that comes with having a baby, there is also an equal, if not greater, amount of fear. Not the fear of child birth (not yet anyways, that will come later) but the fear of messing up and doing something I shouldn't thus potentially hurting this developing baby inside of me. What if I sneeze too hard? Are the hot showers I take too hot? My salad had feta cheese on it and I ate it, will that hurt my baby? A million other what if's run through my head and it's never ending. I mean in the beginning we read what we can about what not to do, but there are always people out there who impose their own theories on you. Family and cultural beliefs that are not based on medical fact but rather cultural folklore, no matter how silly they may seem, they plant this "what if its true" seed in your brain and it can really mess with your head.

"Don't eat watermelon or anything that cools your body temperature" says my dad "it messes with your Che". WHAT? "your Che, balance. You have to keep balance, so don't drink to many cold drinks" he continued. This to me sounded ridiculous, but everything I'm presented with watermelon, guess what I don't eat it...totally messed with my head. I've always been a pretty private person when it comes to people giving me advise, I usually take it with a grain of salt and not really pay too much attention. However, since I'm dealing with uncharted territory here I tend to give a bit more attention when it comes to the stuff people say. But at the same time I know some if it is complete bull$hit; but I can't help to stand on the side of caution.

For example, tea. I'm Chinese and we drink tea...lots and lots of tea, jasmine tea , green tea, orange pekoe, Hong Kong "special" tea. But some teas have caffeine which should be limited when pregnant. When I refused some jasmine tea at dim sum one morning on a visit back home to Toronto my sister said "Really? tell that to all those pregnant Chinese women we see drinking tea with dinner." She made a good point, I mean didn't China have one of the worlds largest populations? Tea hadn't hindered the birth rate of my peoples; was this another bull$hit theory? Yet, I still don't drink tea, any tea.

So here is a list of 10 things I've been steering clear of of far, some may have medical proof to back it up and some are just things people have told me and have messed with my head. I guess some things we'll just never know but better safe then sorry I say.

1. Caffeine (Cola, Coffee, certain teas)

2. Deli meats

3. Unpasteurized dairy (goat cheese, blue cheese)

4. Shellfish (I limit this to once a week in limited amounts)

5. Watermelon, ginseng and other foods that "cool your Che" (thanks dad)

6. Sushi

7. High mercury fish such as swordfish

8. Sugar (possible danger of gestational diabetes)

9. Unwashed fruits and veggies

10. Undercooked meats (I used to like my steak med-rare)

All I know is this, when baby is out, I'm going to for all-you-can eat sushi, drinking lots of green tea and cola with a super sugary dessert, and maybe some watermelon too.

The Real Deal

(Please take note that the above picture is from Google and not my belly)

The strangest thing about the first trimester of pregnancy for me was that sometimes I would "forget" I had something growing inside of me. I mean I couldn't feel it, see it or hear it. The only thing I knew for sure was my body was going haywire, but when I wasn't throwing up, my hair was freshly washed and I was going about my day to day I would literally forget that I was pregnant. It wasn't until my first ultrasound where I actually occurred to me the this baby thing was for real. Looking back, I think this was also a turning point for DH, the day he really realized that he was gonna have a kid in 6 months. I mean he had been enduring my morning nasal symphony and upchuck pyrotechnics for weeks but I don't think it was until he looked up at that TV screen in the ultrasound room did make him realize...oh crap! this is for real.

At what I thought was my 12 week mark we had gone to have an ultrasound. My Doctor had said I could do a IPS (Integrated Prenatal Screening) for potential birth defects, she said it's optional to check for potential Downs Syndrome and other potential issues. I mainly wanted to do it so I could see our baby. I really didn't know what to expect, I mean I had seen ultrasound pictures before but they were always pretty clear; head, hands, tummy, legs everything was already there and you knew it was a baby. So imagine my initial surprise when I saw what looked like a bean with hands and feet up on the screen. I got kind of freaked out to tell you the truth. Eventually angles changed and enlargements were made and our little bean started to look more baby like; a cross between a baby and a bean actually but a tiny human none the less. What was amazing to me was not the shape of the fetus, but the heart beat. This little flicker on the screen that was flickering so frigg'n fast it was hard be believe what it really was. I looked over at DH and he had this huge smile. " That's too cool" at that moment we both knew that this was all for real. I may occasionally had forgotten I was pregnant but as they said in the movie Juno, this was a doodle that couldn't be undone.

There was however a slight miscalculation on my part. Surprise, suprise, I wasn't 12 weeks along as I had originally thought. Seems the little bean was smaller and the tech pegged me at 11 weeks; so I had to go back in 7 days to do the test. Which of course was alright with me, just one more chance to see my insides and have a private screening with DH of our baby to be.

Invasion on the body snatchers

Early into my pregnancy I noticed some changes in my body. You had the standard larger and tender breasts, nausea, bad skin, greasy hair and extreme fatigue. But I also noticed strange little things like a bionic sense of smell (really, I could smell what DH had for lunch when I kissed him as I walked through our front door), and increase in saliva and nasal congestion (so attractive). It turned out my body was no longer my own, I was merely a vessel for breeding, a fact I would learn would prove more true as my pregnancy progressed.

All of the sudden my body was no longer my own. In an instant I had gone from being a active independent woman to a human incubator. I would eat things I wouldn't normally eat, the food I did eat would take longer to pass through since the embryo was getting all it could from everything I was eating (we'll get to that later) , scents that I never minded before suddenly made me want to throw up and my bed time had gone from 11:30Pm on a weeknight to 8:00pm. Now, like many men I'm sure that DH didn't mind that his new wife's boobs had grown but alas, no fun to be had since they would hurt like a MotherF'er and I'm sure my early morning hacking and nose blowing was just the attractive wake up call he had been dreaming of. For me the tipping point where I realized my body was no longer my own was when my regular pants wouldn't fit anymore. I had to graduate to wearing fat pants (aka, yoga pants) most of the time. I was getting too big for my regular jeans, and too small to start with maternity pants. All I could do to accommodate my growing ass, amongst other things, was wear dresses and stretchy pants, but since it was getting colder here in Ottawa yoga pants were my stretchy pants of choice. Due to my limited fashion selection I didn't go out much. Heading out for a casual dinner with friends in yoga pants was still somewhat acceptable but going to a nice place with DH for a chef tasting in stretchy pants; not cool, which was fine with me....more time to sleep. Plus, I would soon learn there was a whole list of foods I should avoid.

Don't get me wrong, I was more then willing to give up my body for 9 months if it meant I would be rewarded with a healthy , happy baby at the end. Even during the misery of throwing up, the pain of new bigger boobs and no longer fitting into my fat pants because my ass was getting bigger and bigger all I could do for weeks was look at myself in the mirror before a getting into the shower and rub my belly and smile. We were having a baby. I was now human incubator and I was OK with it.

Morning Sickness sucks!

One tell tale sign you have a bun in the oven is when you suddenly have the urge to throw up....Lovely. What people don't tell you is that morning sickness is not limited to the morning. It can happen when ever, where ever; morning, evening, ALL DAY LONG! I started being acquainted with the Morning sickness monster around 7-8 weeks in. Now I was lucky enough not to have the morning sickness hang around for very long, it ended for me at the 12 week mark, right around the time I moved into my 2nd trimester, but some poor women have it or much longer, or sometimes I've heard it comes back after a few months...eeek.

Despite my short (and somewhat light) experience with daily upchucking I can tell you it's no walk in the park, especially if you are like me and hate throwing up. The action of puking your brains out is only half the battle, you still deal with this gut-rot feeling lingering all day long. You don't want to throw up....but you feel like you just might and since your senses are heightened, certain smells can put you over the edge. Oh, and the looks and comments you get from people, they're just peachy too. I was blessed enough to have to yak everyday at around 5:00pm; keep in mind, I'm usually still at work at this time. Nothing like running into the work bathroom to upchuck as your co workers hear the faint sound of BLAH...BLAH in the background. And come on, lets face it nobody looks pretty afterwards either, especially when your tired and feeling drained all the time. Funny thing is, when you come back to your desk you get a mixed bag of reactions. Some people keep their head down and pretend they didn't hear you (thank you for minding your own business) and then you have have others that make a stupid comment, or even mimic a vomiting action (those people are assholes).

People tell you little tricks to suppress morning sickness like, stay away from eating too much, don't get too hungry or have some soda crackers and ginger ale but honestly it really depends on the person. I munched on soda crackers, and made sure I was never running on empty and it didn't stop me from running into the bathroom everyday. My advise would be just this; opt5 for a sink when you can. To me getting my head close to where an ass was just makes things even more gross. That, and watch what you eat. Some things are really bad coming back up. Mental note: stay way from bacon cheese burgers and shawarma...trust me.

Sleep is for the weak...and the pregnant

One of the first signs of pregnancy is fatigue. I'm talking I don't want to do anything, going to sleep for 12 hours, too tired to wash my hair, fatigue. I had waited a few days before I told Dear Husband that he was gonna be a daddy. I wanted to think of a cute way to tell him, I mean the first time only happens once right? Yeah, that never happened.

Now, you may think I'm just a lazy ass and that I'm exaggeration, but I'm not. I was feeling tired all the time. I would fall asleep at around 8pm every night and wake up at 7:30 the next morning; I really didn't have any energy to do anything, if I didn't have to work I would have slept all day only waking up to eat and go to the bathroom. DH started to get worried. He thought I was sad or something. "No Dear, I'm just tired" I would say. I can honestly say I felt drained, like this soon to be baby was a mack truck and it just knocked me on my ass . It was like the little bugger inside of me was taking all my super powers away. I would start to take naps on weekends and lay in bed right after I got home from work. Sleep was all the developing embryo needed. No food, no water just sleep. Sleep so that mommy's powers could be taken away as she dozed in her bed.

DH started to get worried since at this point he still had no clue. He thought it was because I didn't have a wedding to plan anymore, like I was falling into a post-wedding depression. "Are you OK? do you need a new hobby or a new project?" he would ask. After a few days of this I couldn't hold it in anymore. "Honey" I said "I'm not depressed, I'm pregnant" the look on his face was priceless. Bet ya he didn't see that one coming.

Congratulations, you're pregnant...or are you?

For a lot of women finding out they are expecting can be a mixed bag of emotions, I mean come on, you life could very well change based on what a stick soaked in pee will tell you. For me it was a just that. I went through a whole gambit of emotions. Dear Husband (DH) and I had just gotten married, we were still in the bliss of wedding day memories and planning out what was to come next in our lives. We had started trying for a baby months before, but nothing, I mean come on, it's not gonna happen just like that....right? Back from our wonderful little mini-Honeymoon getaway, we planned to take a bigger trip in about a year to Asia, and back from the nuptials of my good friend I had a thought. Hmm...I'm late. Okay, not a big deal wait a few more days and then pee on a stick. Let me tell you, those were the roughest few days. All I could think about was "am I?" or "aren't I?"(insert stress), "was this too soon" (insert panic and fear) or "how great would this be" (insert smile). Up and down I went, my over analyzing mind was going nuts. Finally I went to the drug store on my lunch break one day and there I stood in the front of the huge selection of pee sicks. Let me tell you, if you have never had to buy a pee stick before you have no idea. Those suckers are expensive! $20 a pop!? For a pee stick? Are you F'n kidding me? As I sat at work with the pee stick in my purse I felt a little tingle going on in my throat.

Hmm...was I coming down with something? In the back of my mind I knew something was different with my body. So I decided to go to the walk in clinic to get this potential cold looked at. While there I decided to recoup my $20 and maybe save it for another time just in case I wasn't pregnant (Yes, I'm this cheap). When I was being prepped to see the doctor the clinic nurse asked me if I have any questions. I told her I thought I may be pregnant. So she gave me a bottle to pee in and she did a test...for FREE! Negative (insert disappointment) "Better luck next time" she said. I will admit I was bummed. After all that thinking I had basically convinced myself that I was and all I needed was for the pee stick to confirm what I had been feeling for days. So with my prescription in hand I headed back to work. Well, there's always next month.

Another week passed and still nothing. The tickle in my throat was gone but something was still MIA. WTF! I was never this late. I waited a few more days and I brought out my $20 pee stick. I woke up early so I could do this in private. No need to let DH know if there was nothing to tell right? There is was 2 little pink lines. First Response had told me something the walk -in doctors office couldn't, something I had known deep down in side for weeks, I was indeed p regent (insert fear, panic, stress, happiness and jubilation). Off to my regular Doctors office I went. Come on, I had to do one more pee test just to be sure, one negative and one positive, I had to make sure and I wasn't gonna go spend another $20 for something my tax payer dollars entitled me to at the doctor's office.

My advise to those who are trying to get pregnant or think they may already be. Go with your gut, and pee tests are free at the doctor's office in Canada, thumbs up for subsidized healthcare. If your not, it may start to get expensive.

Welcome to the Baby Shoe Diaries

A few family and friends had asked me if I had been blogging about my first pregnancy experience, I mean I blogged about my wedding and about food so why not this life event? I don't know why I hadn't started one sooner. So here I am, 5:20am on a Friday morning in my 27th week of pregnancy starting a new blog. Welcome to The Baby Shoe Diaries. I'll be blogging about the good the bad and the ugly aspects of pregnancy; and believe me, there is plenty good, bad and ugly. Given I'm not the first women to go through this but this is my take on it all from morning sickness to that final push and beyond. You may agree, you may not. Sometimes it'll be gross and maybe once in a while it will make you smile. I'm not trying to change the world here people, just trying to shed a little light and share my experiences with the hopes that moms to-be (and existing moms) out there can relate and maybe crack a smile.