Attack of the Giant Baby

OK so Baby E didn't attack anyone, but she is giant. In her 10th week she weighed 14 lbs 10 oz. and measured in a little above the 97th percentile for her age. Now at 12 weeks she is at 15 Lbs 11 oz. Not sure if it's genetics (I'm a big girl myself) or if it's my super fatty breast milk but this little girl is thriving. It made me wonder, is she too big? Especially when nurses and other people around us say "She's only 10 weeks? wow, she's a big girl", "Are you only Breast feeding her, my baby is 5 months and only weighs 13 Lbs?" No, I'm force feeding my baby bacon you dumbass is what I really want to say to these people. So for a few days this was on my mind. Was I nursing her too much? I was exclusively breast feeding so it wasn't like I was pumping her full of formula and she was eating every 2.5 - 3 hours, wasn't that normal? Now I know I've said before, trust the mommy insticts but you can imagine how it's easier said then done, especially when your pediatrition says "You're only feeding her when shes hungry, right?" Yes, I've come to realize Baby E's pediatrition is somewhat of a *beep*. I was reminded by another mother that breast fed babies only eat when hungry, they don't over eat and spit up when they do. I was fine, Baby E was just a big eater, or so I hope.

Maybe it's just my genetics, after all I am a bigger girl and so is everyone in my family. With the exception of myself we are all for the most part considered pretty tall (5'9-6 feet). That's pretty tall for Asians. Maybe all those years of eating dumplings and noodles resulted in some super sonic fatty breast milk that produces giant babies; who knows. All I know is Baby is seems pretty healthy and happy. The only issue now is she is heavier so has a harder time with tummy time, which she hates my the way. I can't blame her though, to learn to lift all that weight and hold herself up with her pudgy arms can't be easy. But that's the price she will pay for being a big girl, more tummy time. The price I pay? Having to buy more sleepers and diapers as she grows out of them monthly. She is wearing 6-9 months now....ugh.

Blame It On Mom

For the past month and a bit I've been dealing with the fact that I may be messing up my kid, well, that's what books, articles and other random people have been telling me. What ever happened to letting a woman follow her mommy instincts? Sure, I'll probably mess up Baby E somehow (something I'm trying not to do) but we all have our issues, right?

I was reading the book "The Baby Whisperer" and though I took much of what she said to practice (and some has worked and somethings have not) I refuse to force my baby to do something she doesn't want to do. Like stay up for a period of time after eating, if she wants to sleep after she eats so be it. Yes, I understand that she may think it's OK to sleep after each meal when she grows up, but I as a mother feel I need to listen to what she is telling me. Or napping for no more then 3 hours? How do you think I have have found the time to write up this entry? These "suggestions" and opinions just continue to perpetuate the fears of a first time mother, that you are messing up your kid and doing a bad job at mothering thus, causing more stress; as if running on little sleep and being responsible for this new little person isn't stressful enough.

There is an opinion and a "study" for everything. Should you carry your child all the time, some say yes because it makes them feel secure; some say no, because it makes them clingy...so my child can be clingy but self confident or detached/insecure but independent? Hmmm...decisions decisions. How about sleeping. Do I rock her to sleep or do I let her cry it out? If I rock her she will become dependent and have trouble soothing herself later in life. If I let her cry it out she will have trust and abandonment issues? How is a mom supposed to choose?

I say let me go with my gut. Let me listen to my baby and use my own reasoning and mommy instincts. I mean Baby E was in me growing and thriving for 40 weeks aren't we somehow connected? She listened to my heart beat, ate what I ate, found warmth and comfort in me and nurses from me today. I am somewhat intelligent, not crazy and only have her best interest at heart, should that count to something? Shouldn't that at least make me somewhat of a fit mother?

Will I stop reading these books? Hellz no, I may be able but I am still inexperienced and need all the help I can get.. But I'll take what they say with a gain of salt, picking and choosing what I will follow, and agreeing to disagree with the stuff I think is crap. Like I said before, we're all a bit messed up anyways right? None of us are perfect, our parents made us this way.